Elevator Scenario #284 and Chocolate White Chip Cookies

The other day at work I was in an elevator. I should stop the story there. I’m convinced nothing good ever happens in an elevator. They creak and make unusual noises. They are full of gossip and rumors. They get stuck. They open on every floor. They go up when you thought they were going down, they go down when they promised you they would go up. They move slowest when you want them to move the quickest. Like I said, nothing good happens in an elevator.

On this fateful morning, I decided to take the elevator because (quite frankly) it was friday at 7am and the idea of hiking from the 1st floor to the 9th floor wasn’t sitting well with me. Just this once, I deserved an elevator ride.

My fellow passengers were a middle-aged male and a young female. I smiled. They smiled back. She said, ‘Good morning.’ That’s when disaster struck.

The middle-aged male (too young to make the following mistake) asked the female, “Congrats! How far along are you?”

She replied quietly, “My daughter actually just turned 3.”

She wasn’t pregnant. She didn’t even look pregnant, not even close. She was bright red at this point. He was brighter red at this point. I was the brightest red at this point. No one knew where to look or what to say. And of course, the elevator was moving as slow as possible.

—- Insert grasshopper chirping noise —-

What felt like an eternity of silence ensued. I was praying that elevator music would suddenly start blaring or the man would get off the elevator, but unfortunately we had all committed to the 9th floor.

So when the elevator miraculously stopped on the 3rd floor to pick up another person, I bailed, condemning myself to walking up the remaining 6 flights of stairs, but ensuring not one more awkward elevator scenario would occur.

And as for my thighs, they have never looked better or felt stronger.

For days when you’re stuck in an elevator with a not-pregnant person and a guy who thinks the not-pregnant person is pregnant, I would recommend these chocolate white chip cookies. In fact, I would even recommend them if you somehow happen to have a mediocre or satisfactory elevator ride.


Chocolate White Chip Cookies
Source: Barefoot Contessa Parties! Cookbook
Printable Recipe

2 sticks unsalted butter
1C brown sugar
1C white sugar
2tsp vanilla extract
2 extra-large eggs*
2/3C cocoa powder
2C AP flour
1tsp salt
1tsp baking soda
1 1/2lb white chocolate, coarsely chopped

Preheat oven to 350. In a bowl, cream butter and sugar until fluffy. Add vanilla and eggs. Beat until combined. Add in cocoa powder.

In a separate bowl, sift flour, salt, and baking soda. Add dry mixture to wet ingredients. Beat on low speed until combined. Stir in white chocolate chunks.

Using a 1 3/4inch ice cream scoop (or large rounded tablespoon) drop dough onto lined baking sheet. Slightly flatten each cookie. Bake at 350 for 15 minutes. Remove from oven. Allow to cool on pan for a few minutes. Transfer to wire rack until cool. Store in airtight container.

*I used large eggs without a problem


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